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Wednesday, August 8. 2007
Self Amusement and Forum Etiquette
Well, I’ve been jerking around all day today — literally! There are a couple hundred Playboy (and other) models in my friends list on MySpace so I’ve been exploring my prurient instincts to no end. Hands on, so to speak. There were a couple three who really caught my … err … attention today: Kimberly, SaraLiz and Carlotta! Carlotta Champagne … I’m so deeply infatuated … she likes listening to Frank Zappa — just the girl for me! But SaraLiz … just looking at her profile pic makes me shudder with … thoughts. Same with Kimberly. All three are in my top friends if you want to go take a look.What got me started (this is where I blame my sloth on someone else) was a blog Kimberly had posted concerning “good guys” versus “bad guys.” After exploring every angle of Kimberly’s natural, physical deportment, I of course posted my comments about her blog posting. The blog was basically written by a couple of guys who can’t get laid, explaining why they can’t get laid (it’s the women’s fault) and the terrible injustice done to all mankind because they can’t hook up with women like Kimberly. Personally, I feel that if Kimberly met me — and could get over my penchant for irresponsibility — she would consider me a pretty attractive guy. Some would call that confidence, my friends will tell me it’s delusional. Either or, it’s my fantasy and I’m sticking to it.
Well, the goofing off is over — for now — and it’s time to get serious. Really serious … or not so serious. There really are some practical benefits for self-gratification. Can I write masturbation and get away with it? I’m in a much happier state of mind. Some might write back, “TMI,” but maybe we should explore the positive qualities of satiating one’s sexual needs and desires with self-applied manipulation. Oh, how I long for the coming “Sex and the City” movie.
I read somewhere there will be a movie in the future. Are Carrie and Big still together? How about Samantha and Smith? Does she have a relapse of breast cancer? Is Charlotte, the good Wasp, still a good Jewish wife? And Miranda, always my favorite, is she still with Steve, the tavern proprietor? So many questions. Miranda, if you remember, moved to Brooklyn with Steve, to live in a house with their child.
So, let’s get back to basics; this blog page was initially intended for political reparté, but in the past months it has lapsed into such topics as sports, sex, films and music. Which brings up Barry Bonds: he now holds the record for most lifetime career homeruns. Congratulations Barry. At least you got something out of the steroids. Okay, it’s alleged Bonds took steroids, but in the sealed testimony that was supposed to remain secret but was leaked to the press, Bonds admitted taking steroids, although he claims he didn’t know it was a banned substance. There won’t be an asterisk beside his name in the record books, as there was (is) for Roger Maris — The asterisk doesn’t really exist, but in mid season, 1961, the baseball commissioner said that unless Babe Ruth’s single season home run record was broken within 154 games, both records would stand equally in the record books, which officially don’t exist. The truth is the old-timers didn’t like anyone breaking any of the Babe’s records so they did as much as they could to diminish Maris’s accomplishment. Ahhhh … baseball … America’s past time.
On the same day Bonds broke Hammerin’ Hank Aaron’s career home run record, seven of the Democrats running for president attended a “forum” hosted by MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann in Chicago’s Soldiers Field. Seven? Yeah … the frontrunners were successful in keeping “the crazy guy” out of the forum.
The “Crazy Guy” would be former Alaska senator Mike Gravel. If you remember, or know, the history of the draft, it was Gravel’s five-month filibuster that forced Nixon to begin ending the draft. Gravel is also the guy who publicized the Pentagon Papers, first by reading the text in Congress during a filibuster and then by publishing his own book.
Crazy like a fox! So, in honor of Gravel’s heroic history, Click Here for his campaign website. All you right-wingers that won’t serve in the “volunteer” military but are happy to promote and encourage other young men and women to go to Iraq and become IED fodder, thank Gravel for making it possible to avoid going without having to use draft-dodging loopholes like deferments (used five times by Vice President Cheney) or having your granddaddy get you in the National Guard (As used by President Bush and former Vice President Dan Quayle).Unlike today, during the Vietnam Era the National Guard was a great place to avoid the draft and a trip to Vietnam. With so many young men conscripted for two compulsory years of service, primarily in the Army, there was no shortage of personnel available for a tour of duty in the war zone so it was a rare day indeed when a National Guard member or reservist went to war. But, such billets were hard to get—since many Americans wanted to avoid Vietnam without appearing — overtly anyway — unpatriotic.
The forum in Chicago was hosted by the AFL-CIO, yes, a labor union, and attended by 15,000 members of the AFL-CIO and their affiliate unions. So you know the candidates spent the 90 minutes trying to out labor one another. The candidates with the best labor credentials are of course Senators Chris Dodd (CT) and Joe Biden (DL), but that wasn’t really swaying the crowd much; it was still the Clinton-Obama show.
One thing we can take away from the forum, Hillary is our girl! She said so! “If you want a winner who knows how to take them on,” she said of the ‘right wing machine,’ “I'm your girl.” That drew thunderous applause.There’s a reason Hillary Clinton is the odds-on favorite to represent the Democratic Party for president 15 months from now — and it isn’t just her money-collecting skills: The woman is a formidable campaigner who isn’t afraid to mix it up with her opponents and rarely — if ever — makes mistakes. She’s tough, knows how to win and has a large number of core Democrats supporting her campaign. Unless Bill does something stupid to cast a pall on her campaign, Hillary will be the one I vote for in November 2008.
The real news of this event though was the fact that the top tier candidates were able to exclude Gravel from the forum. His voice needs to be heard just as equally as those of Obama, Clinton and John Edwards. Who will be excluded next, Dennis Kucinich? Dodd and Biden are long-standing and powerful senators so it isn’t likely the Clinton camp at least will do anything to piss off those two, but it’s no secret the top-tier candidates don’t want the other five out on the campaign trail taking voters and campaign dollars from their respective campaigns. It’s all about the money — campaign donations — and pesky things like these lower-tier candidates can’t get in the way of their collecting it, all of it.
Then of course you have two of these eight candidates (Clinton, Obama, Edwards, Dodd, Biden, Governor Bill Richardson, Kucinich and Gravel) who quite frankly appeal to the stridently liberal wing of the Democratic Party and often call into question the records of the top three candidates. The two of course are Gravel and Kucinich. The want an immediate withdrawal from Iraq, Kucinich sponsored a bill to impeach Vice President Cheney—both accused their Democratic colleagues of caving into the White House over the Defense Appropriations Bill which, if it had stayed as the Dems first wrote it, would have started a withdrawal from Iraq. And both blast their colleagues for voting yea in 2002 for the resolution giving Bush the power to start the war in the first place.
Kucinich and Gravel also accuse their colleagues of caving in to the White House over the wire-tapping program, which has now been renewed with its same lack of concern for the civil liberties of we citizens.
Yeah, if I’m a top tier candidate hoping to win the nomination next year, I don’t want these two running around the country telling the constituency how I backed down from the White House, even though my party is in control of Congress. And god-forbid the constituency hear Kucinich’s health care plan that is straight out of — gasp! — France! A single payer health care system that eliminates for-profit health insurance companies? No fuckin’ way! I like paying too much for health care (if I can get it) that treats me like an irritant instead of a patient.
Yep, the Democratic Party, or at least the voice and face of the party, doesn’t want the public at large to perceive the Democrats as a bunch of anti-social Socialists so they’re doing their best to silence those in the party the pundits and Republican rivals like to label as the “MoveOn.org” crowd.
You know MoveOn is doing something right if the Righties are using them to label the Democrats. It also means the Righties are afraid of MoveOn’s power. Connect them up with the Daily Kos blogging community and you have one powerful group of (mostly) Democratic voters.
This was going to end about 600 words back—and I suppose I cold shorten it by removing my labored sentiments concerning self-gratification—but what the Hell, I’m rebelling against the Democratic Party’s efforts to out family value the party of family values. What’s next? Is the party with one marriage candidates gonna start making its people start getting multiple divorces and marriages to compete with the values of their Republican counterparts?
Sometimes the irony is just too obvious for humor.
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