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Sunday, January 4. 2009
It's a Mystery
The great mysteries of life:What is our purpose on Earth, why am I here? What comes after life? And when we get a glimpse at our own mortality, when and how will I die?
Most people hate talking about these topics and if you bring them up, there’s a good chance the person on the other end of the conversation will automatically assume you are either a fatalist, prone to depression and a glass-half-empty attitude, or you’re suicidal. Americans, by and large, do not like discussing any topics that involve any introspection on their own mortality.
That’s another great mystery: why are Americans so afraid of death we don’t even want to talk about it? For many, “Death” is a depressing subject. Rather, let’s talk about your job, better yet my job, or better yet, the new season of American Idol!
Well, one of my favorite topics is Hooters Girls! My friend John and I had lunch at the Rancho Bernardo Hooters! There’s nothing like a Hooters Girl to fuel your unrealistic expectations!
Then of course there is always the NFL Playoffs. My skeptical — not cynical — view of Saturday’s game between the Indianapolis Colts and the San Diego Chargers in Qualcomm Stadium was that the Colts were on a tear, Peyton Manning had woken up and was beginning to start a pro-bowl worthy season. Much to my surprise, the Chargers were up to the task and they won in dramatic fashion just over six minutes into overtime. Hero of the game: Darren Sproles, the 5’6” running back filling in for the injured LaDanian Tomlinson.
Back to the topic: The question of why Americans are so afraid of mortality is a mystery. Not all Americans of course, and many who avoid the topic at all costs will tell you they aren’t afraid of either death or talking about death. They just like to “keep positive!” They don’t want to “dwell on the negative.” Often enough, these are people who have at least a modicum of religious faith, most likely of the Judeo-Christian variety. And that’s okay.
Brings up another trait I’m trying to change in myself: be a more tolerant person when it comes to religion. If most people are afraid of death, I’m afraid of religion. Even though I believe the world would be better off without it, I need to accept that people have a right to believe in religion if they choose. Just had to edit the last statement from “cling” to religion.
We all die. The only questions are when and how? And isn’t that what we really obsess about when it comes to death? How long will I live? How will I die? Some of us get a clue as to the how and when and that’s not really pleasant. On the other hand, it does a great job of reordering our priorities if they’ve been out of balance.
Some people are blissfully ignorant — like the skiiers and snowboarders who were killed in avalanches in Canada and Wyoming (I think). Bet none of them even thought about dying in the mornings of the days when they were killed. But, you have to wonder if they thought about it when they crossed into areas that were off-limits due to the threat of avalanches, as some did despite the posted warnings. Personally, I have no sympathy for someone who defies the warnings to do something like snowboarding or skiing in an area posted as “off limits.” Too bad for you. The survivors of those parties ought to be charged with a crime — being fatally stupid.
Okay, who am I to talk. I once went scuba diving on LSD.
It isn't just death we are afraid of, we can worry ourselves to death if we dwell on the when, where and how. That’s the true rub right there. The purpose of life is to live each day, each moment to the fullest and enjoy the moment we have at hand — ironic considering I’m writing this in my tiny cubicle at work. “Enjoy being at work? My god! That’s ... that’s ... unthinkable!”
The next question then becomes, am I willing to walk the talk?
In the October 22, 2008 post I quoted a Buddhist axiom: “Learn to die and thou shall learn how to live. There shall none learn how to live that has not learnt to die.” In the Buddhist philosophy, from my uneducated interpretation, we start from the premise that life is suffering and death is inevitable. We should not fear either death or suffering. Accept death as a part of life and then don’t sit and wait for death, go and live life. And if we do that, we can then replace the suffering with happiness and contentment.This is what I’m pondering today, my birthday. Not death, but life. Death is but a part in this play. I think about volunteering to leave work early and enjoy life a little more. Why can’t I just enjoy sitting here in this tiny cubicle? Whatever I choose — or maybe someone higher up in the food chain will choose for me — I’ll do it without regret or a longing to do something else or to be somewhere else. I am here and I am content with that.
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